The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
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