Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I think my nap took me to another dimension
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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