Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize