Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
