we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Randomize
