Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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