Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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