Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
