Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
