Non-Jews are for practice
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
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