Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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