Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
