he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize