i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
high people should be assigned attendants
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize