Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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