i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize
