He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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