First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
