I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
