My room smells like vodka and shame
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
