I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
