I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
My vagina just recognized that song.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
