He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
