Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
