Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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