Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
