Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Randomize
