next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
