Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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