I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
