she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
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