Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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