ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
