I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize
