All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Randomize
