My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
