she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Randomize
