come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
