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I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I believe in your delicious
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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