hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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