how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
