So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
