Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(970): View more from Colorado

Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.

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(304): View more from West Virginia

hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I'm pregnant just thinking about him.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.

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(330): View more from Ohio

I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...

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(607): View more from New York

Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.

(845): View more from New York

Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.

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(541): View more from Oregon

I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.

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(604): View more from British Columbia

I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology

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