I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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