Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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