in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize