Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
