Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Randomize
