she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
