I bet he comes in French.
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Randomize
