Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
