Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
